Rookie of the Year

So it’s the end of March, which means the time has come for baseball season, but honestly, is anybody that excited? March madness is coming to a close and football is still a few months away, so we, the sports nation, are stuck watching 162 games and 60000 hours of baseball highlights on ESPN. Normally, the only thing exciting enough to wake me up during the baseball season is the playoffs, which are still a series of the best of five or seven games.

However,there might be something out there that can grab the sports world's attention. I was doing a little stumbling and I stumbled upon this little five year old kid that can hit an 85 mph fastball from either side of the plate and can field the ball on defense and even make the throw to first. I was skeptical at first, but this kid truly is talented.

Even in the midst of this little youngster’s exceptional ability, there seems to be some harsh criticisms about his parents and coaches. Some say that he is being pushed too hard to become this next “LeBron-like” star.

Nobody knows if this kid will ever be in the majors or if he will give up the game forever when he turns twelve. This kid has amazing talent for his age, but I think he will burn out quickly from the pressure of his coaches and parents.

He's Baaaaaaaaaaccckkkkkkk

Tiger has recently announced his long-awaited return to the golfing world, causing a nation-wide debate of how he will perform with the looming presence of his very much publicized affair with his wife, Elin.

Everybody knows the story: Tiger had his 19 or so mistresses, Elin found out and was PISSED, Tiger tried to drive away but crashed into a fire hydrant, she smashed his car windows and his face with a 9-iron, Tiger’s world came crashing down around him.

I’m not here to reprimand him or criticize him for what he did or why he did it. I just don’t understand why people are so obsessed with all of this. Tiger did what he did. Get over it. Tiger’s daily life does not affect me in any way, so why would I waste my time worrying about how many chicks he banged?

What I am interested in, however, is his return to the golfing world in the sport’s most prestigious and most celebrated tournament, the Masters. Tiger, who has been known for his focus, calm emotions, and aggressive play, will be put to the test as he stands toe to toe with the worlds greatest.

Some doubt that Tiger will be able to perform half as well as he normally does. They say he will crack under the pressure from the ever lurking media and that he will not even make the cut to play in the final round on Sunday.

That’s a load of bullshit. We are talking about TIGER WOODS, THE WORLDS GREATEST GOLFER. He has been nothing but a stone-cold killer in the golfing world ever since he appeared on the scene. This guy has had a golf club glued to his hands ever since he was 4 years old. He made his first hole in one when he was 6! Sure, he had a whole busload of distractions and his family life was in shambles, but the man took over five months off and got his life back together. That was a longer time not playing in a tournament than when his father passed away. But do you really think the world’s best is not going to practice at all for 5 months?

I am willing to put money down that Tiger comes out for his first round on Thursday as focused as ever. He entered into the Masters and he is going to play his best to get that green jacket and he will not let anything get in his way.

Hey... It Was Spring Break

SPRING BREAK 2010

With the sunny days just looming around the corner, many students are practically giddy with excitement. And why shouldn’t they be? Spring Break is a time to get away from all of the hassles of schoolwork and normal life. It’s a time to get a little wild and crazy for a week. Being in college can cause a great deal of stress on most students and Spring Break is a well deserved relief.

So I’m here today to provide you all with some expert advice on how to have a SAFE and FUN Spring Break…

1. Always use the buddy system.
2. Staying in groups helps too.
3. Make sure you are always with people you can trust.
4. Always apply sunscreen before long hours in the sun.
5. Not everybody has a super model body like these sexy ladies, so please choose a swimsuit that is both tasteful and fashionable.
6. Don’t do anything that your mother wouldn’t be too proud of.

Most of all have fun this Spring Break. Wherever you decide to go, realize that you are only this young for a short period in your life. This is the prime time folks. The big leagues. This is the only truly acceptable time to make huge mistakes and get away with it completely by simply shrugging and saying, “Hey… it’s Spring Break….”

Soon you will all be in that awkward phase, when you are at the beach party and everybody is kind of staring at you, saying to their friend, “that creepy guy over there is like 40 years old,” and your Spring Breaking days will be over for good. Have fun sipping that piña colada by yourself at the end of the bar staring at the young babes you creepy shit.

So now I end this post by saying get out there and live it up this Spring Break and go do something stupid and regrettable…

Just remember, what happens on Spring Break, stays on Spring Break… Actually no it doesn’t, people are always taking pictures and that stuff will be up on Facebook the next day. It will make a good story, though. But hey… it was Spring Break.

Lax Bros, What the Hell?

Growing up in the Midwest, the only thing I knew about lacrosse was that it was a game played with some sticks with nets and a ball. That and some lacrosse players at Duke allegedly raped a girl at a party. So that’s the only reputation I had of the lax bros before coming to college in Texas. And who knew it would be such a popular sport here where football reigns supreme?

I may just be speaking through ignorance here, but what the hell is wrong with lacrosse players? They swoop in from the new england prep schools talking all about how sweet their wands are and what type of head is best for their shafts and where to get the best pocket pounder for their stick. It all just seems to be a little bit too weird for me.

They say that 90% of lax is in the flow. Now if you don't know what "flow" is, then don't be too worried. I had never heard this term before either, so I did my research. According to urbandictionary.com, flow is described as "the style and essence of a True Lax Bro. It is usually referred to as long, wavy or curly hair, which can give someone flow, however, flow can also be attained by the equipment and uniform of a player (calf socks, knee length shorts). More importantly flow comes from the style of a player's game; if a player always makes sloppy plays or is a ball hog they are lacking flow, but if a player can make plays and pick corners he has flow."

So the lax bro necessities include:

- Sick Flow (obviously), the longer the better, wavy "lettuce" (hair that sticks out of the back of the helmet) is a must
- Backwards college hat, flat-billed preferably
- Pastel colored button-down shirts
- A nice pocket pounder
- College lax pinnies
- Turf shoes with mid-calf socks
- A sweet pair of shades
- Lax stick NEVER leaves their grip
- And Sick Flow... again, because it is the most important

Internet

In Don Tapscott’s book, Grown up Digital, some of the major criticisms of the “Net Generation” are presented. Of the ten criticisms listed by Tapscott, there was one in particular that grabbed my attention. The criticism stated that the Net Generation has lacked social skills and there is no incentive to live an active and healthy lifestyle. Instead of meeting and talking to others in person, they communicate through the internet. Instead of going outside for some physical activity, they sit in front of a television playing video games. According to this criticism, the Net Generation, our generation, has become fat, lazy, and socially awkward.

I cannot agree with this criticism because I believe that it is taking too much liberty in generalizing the entire Net Generation into one category. Of course, there are those people who sit in their basement playing video games for days on end and never see the light of day. Conversely, there are those people that exercise daily and are not completely absorbed in their internet and video games. For the criticism to make that much of a sweeping judgment is absurd.

For example, in a fairly recent study conducted by Hope M. Cummings, M.A., of the University of Michigan, Ann Arbor, and Elizabeth A. Vandewater, Ph.D., of the University of Texas at Austin, they found that only 36% of their population of kids aged 10-19 played video games. The average time spent playing video games during the weekdays was 44 minutes and on the weekends it was only one hour and 37 minutes. This is enough evidence to refute the idea that our entire generation is full of fat, lazy slobs.

Short Shorts... The Comeback Story

As it has been said many times before, history has a tendency to repeat itself. Whether the repeated behavior is positive or negative, the majority of people have no choice but to accept the travel back in time.

However, we don’t always have to be happy about it and sometimes the absurdity of select behaviors must be pointed out and harshly ridiculed. Therefore, I would like to ask the general male population of Dallas……

WHAT’S WITH THE SHORT SHORTS????

The short shorts fad has blown through America already, so why try to resurrect a dead trend? This fashion disaster was in its prime during the 60s and 70s. The short shorts were made famous by many basketball players, who thought the length of the shorts gave them more movement and better aerodynamics. By the 1990s, the short shorts jumped from the hairy men to the sleek, slender, and sexy legs of the American ladies, where they belong.

Everywhere I look, I see young men wearing the shorts that only reach the mid-thigh, which is way too much skin for one man to show. Seriously, do everybody a favor and buy shorts that fit.